Friday, April 18, 2008
My dog...the con artist
First thing, right off the bat...my dog is very spoiled. She's not Paris Hilton pet-spoiled...but she's more cared for than a lot of CHILDREN in this world, sadly. From time to time, my dog will get a tummy-ache because I am a bad mom and feed her what I'm eating. Not in large quantities, mind you...but a french fry here...a chip there...etc. Sometimes if I've given her more than I realize I should have...later on in the day or the next day - but usually in the wee hours of the morning when I should be ASLEEP, her tummy will gurgle very loudly...more of a squeal, actually...and she spends a lot of time going in and out of her doggy door. Since I'm the bad mom that made her feel that way, I will get up at 3:00 or 4:00 in the morning and scramble her eggs. This is what I've been told in the past to do for her when she has an upset stomach, because it is bland and apparently soothing. Or I'll make her minute rice...but she appreciates the eggs more and I kind of do as well - because then I'm not picking day old rice out of her curly ears or my bed. For whatever reason...the other day, I came home from work and she was SO happy to see her mommy - as usual...did the routine...up on the couch...gets her kisses and hugs and proceeded to be still very excited about me being home. When I went to go change my clothes, I heard her go outside - no big deal. She was out there for quite some time, so I went to check on her like the over-protective mom that I am...and she's chowing on grass out by the fence. I did notice that she hadn't eaten her dog food all day, as well. So I go through the routine...get out the skillet, the eggs, the bowl, etc. I check on her again...still eating grass...but is she 'watching' me watch her eat grass? Is she chewing, but yet, looking over her shoulder to see if the sympathy card is being well-played? It's hard to tell. A few minutes later, as I continue to scramble away, she comes trotting in and the tail begins to wag as she realizes that I'm cooking...more than likely for her...since I rarely cook for myself. I begin to question her..."are you feeling okay?" "what's up with you eating grass?" "you seemed fine when i came home - what's the matter?" "are you just trying to get me to scramble you eggs so you don't have to eat your regular food?" Her tail is really wagging at this point. I then let the eggs cool and dump them in the bowl with her food - and she about shoves me aside with her nose to get to her food - that interestingly enough...she didn't want to eat before now...and then proceeds to eat all of the eggs and her REGULAR food. So now I'm convinced that she thinks I'm the stupidest mother EVER and was probably pretend-moving her head near the fence to SIMULATE that she was eating grass...just to throw me into a panic that she might barf on my carpet, knowing I would immediately scramble her some eggs. I should have made her rice...then her ploy wouldn't have been nearly as tasty.