Thursday, October 9, 2008

Crosswalks=Dead Man Walking

Crosswalks are just another way of putting a bullseye on your back...but yet I have to use them everyday to get from my car (thank you parking nazis) to the building I work in. To add to the fun, I usually get to work about 6:30 in the morning...when it's still dark. So not only do I have to do the stealth walk in the dark to avoid being raped and murdered...I have to make sure I'm not getting flattened as I cross the street. The other day as I was getting ready to step out onto the street...something flies past me...a dude on his bicycle...with a little headlight...cycling like he's in the Tour de France. That would have been a great collision story if I hadn't seen his "beacon of light" bearing down on me. Everyday I have to weigh my "should I go now?" options...since there are notoriously those boneheads that are oblivious to the fact that YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO STOP AT A CROSSWALK. Or there's the lady that as you're crossing the street zooms up to the intersection and stops...IN the crosswalk...yeah thanks...let me just walk AROUND you. The afternoons at quittin' time are even better because there is actually traffic out then. There are people that are pulling out of the parking garage knowing there is a crosswalk right as they're coming out of the garage...but yet seem confused...if not annoyed that there are masses of people crossing to get to THEIR cars, that they have to stop for. All this before mentioned fun is just on the SIDE streets...not even the main deathway of three lanes of traffic (each way) that you have to cross to get back to your car (again...nazis). Luckily there are those 3 second crossing lights to lead you to safety...because what would we do without those??? Well other than them barely giving you a chance to step off the curb before they're warning you to cross for your life. They start flashing "Don't Walk" literally before you've crossed ONE lane of traffic...so the rest of the time it's flashing at you as you cross the street...it's more of a taunt...in bright red (for blood)..."You're Dead" "You're Dead" "You're Dead". Winter's going to be great...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Maybe you should get an orange vest to wear so the people will at least see you before they run you down in the crosswalk :)